Thursday, October 14, 2021

Spouse In The House by Cynthia Ruchti and Becky Melby

A complimentary review copy was provided to me.

When I first learned about Spouse in the House, I was a little worried it could be too much of a self-help book but the humor the two authors and those that they reached out to share in the story makes it a light-hearted way to read about a serious challenge and think about things differently. Some of the topics are more about sharing a home but most are about the shift when suddenly you find yourself with a SITH (spouse in the house) - love that term by the way. They provide many practical tips to help you cope with changes in your own life. They refer to their husbands (who share a first name) by nicknames throughout the book. This adds a bit of humor to their stories but I especially enjoyed when they also shared their husbands thoughts on the topics, helping give a fuller view to the story.

This book was very timely with the current situation where many people are finding themselves at home with their spouse (and their kids in some cases too) close to twenty-four hours a day. This book is a great read for not only those that are facing the reality of having a spouse home all day due to retirement but has applicability to those that find both spouses at home because they now have the opportunity to work from home or can take college courses online. It's a good read for those that are newlyweds (or about to weds) that haven't had to share a home with a spouse before. It really examines the realities of being home together, especially when you haven't been used to it.

One thing that was particularly interesting to me as I read was the point of view because in my household, I am the one that suddenly found myself at home all the time about 2 years ago. I had worked outside the home for the prior 23 years (and other than a brief underemploymnet period about 18 years earlier) while my husband had worked from the house first in sales and then in computers. When my company eliminated my role, I was suddenly at home all the time and then, when I found a job, it was fully remote. So, now we are both working from home. We definitely operate on different schedules which can be both good and bad. For a while, I tried to adjust to eat lunch with him but decided that although it was nice to take a break together, it really was easier to stick to our own schedules most of the time. Now, we take time for lunch together only occassionally. We each have our own time where we fit in exercise, although on occassion we will walk together. He has his space in the home office and I am primarily based in the kitchen and will use the game table or the office for calls, depending on whether he is using the office or not. We have found the way to coexist during the work day. We balance household things while making sure that we each are able to get our work done.

The stories, humor and practical tips flow easily with the conversational style of the book. So much of what they share and the stories they tell are very relatable and you feel like you get to know quite a bit about the authors and their husbands. I would recommend this book to anyone that has a SITH and is looking for insight on how to best coexist.

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About the Book

A frank and funny look at what to do when together is too close

Two’s company, especially for those who love each other. So what happens when—due to retirement, working from home, or even running a business together—spouses find that being in the same space all the time is awkward, complex, annoying, and just plain challenging? How can partners coexist without co-exhausting each other?

Cynthia Ruchti and Becky Melby know all too well how adjusting to a new, all-the-time closeness can cause the bliss of marriage to form blisters. Drawing from their experiences, and from men and women across the country in the same situation, the authors take a deep breath and dive into the root causes. They dig into what God’s Word has to say, and they offer practical tips for learning the spiritual, emotional, relational, and even physical steps that can help readers replace irritation with peace.

For any couple who wants their home to be a refuge of peace and serenity for all—not just themselves—and who wants to know they aren't alone in the mental and physical claustrophobia of too much togetherness, Spouse in the House is a vulnerable, charming, and pragmatic breath of hope.

Click here to read an excerpt from Spouse in the House.

About the Authors

Cynthia Ruchti tells stories hemmed in hope through her novels, novellas, devotions, and nonfiction, and through speaking for women’s events, retreats, writers’ conferences, and workshops. She draws from 33 years of experience writing and producing the 15-minute daily radio broadcast, “The Heartbeat of the Home.”

Ruchti’s more than thirty books have garnered reader, retailer, reviewer, and other industry awards. She serves as Professional Relations Liaison for American Christian Fiction Writers, is a founding board member of the Deliver Hope ministry and is part of the worship team at her church. She’s also a literary agent with Books & Such Literary Management.

Ruchti and her husband, Bill, live in the heart of Wisconsin, not far from their three children and six grandchildren.

Learn more about Cynthia Ruchti and her writing at or by following her on Facebook (@CynthiaRuchtiReaderPage), Instagram (@cynthiaruchtiauthor), and Twitter (@cynthiaruchti).

Becky Melby has authored more than twenty novels and novellas. Spouse in the House is her first non-fiction book release.

The Melbys have four sons and fifteen grandchildren and make their home in southeastern Wisconsin. When not writing or spoiling grandchildren, she may be found touring the country with Bill in their camper or on their Honda Gold Wing motorcycle.

Find out more about Becky Melby’s books at or follow her on Facebook (becky.melby.9) and Instagram (@beckymelbybooks). She also shares short blog posts each Friday on the Fill My Cup, Lord page on Facebook.
The Giveaways are not hosted by A Busy Mom of Two but are part of the book tour, please see giveaway for official rules and guidelines. No compensation was received for this review. All opinions expressed are my own or that of my family. A complimentary review copy was provided to me.